The Private Parts

When I was growing up we didn’t say certain words.   Those words were nonexistent in our home.  Private parts were not talked about.  I vividly remember riding my brother’s bike…remember banana seats?  Remember how you would slide off of it, like butter in a cast iron pan? Well, I slid off the seat…on a boy’s bike.   The memory I have, isn’t  the actual slip-up (or down as the case may be) but of telling my mother that “it hurts where I pee from”.
I made a promise to myself that my children would never feel embarrassment from having to discuss any body part.  Now, mind you, I didn’t want them yelling out as if in a Kindergarten Cop movie.  But I certainly, didn’t want them to not be able to talk to me openly.   So I decided to compromise (because, as you can see, I am still not very comfortable saying those “dirty” words).
What I came up with was “pee-er”   Boy and girls can have pee-ers.  (and yes, as they got older, I planned on using the correct terminology). And there’s a fly on my wall that gets quite a belly laugh out of me yelling at my 25 year old son to “PUT YOUR PEE-ER AWAY…Nobody wants to see that!!!”
So fast forward to Buddy at about 5 years old.  We were in the process of attempting potty training (which failed).  We were also in the process of training a new service provider. (which I hate to this day)
So here we are Buddy, the main provider and the new back up provider all in the bathroom.  I had told her that we call his boy part, a pee-er.
As I stood in the kitchen nearby, I heard the new provider say something, and I listened.   She said it again.   When they came out, I asked her what she had called it…she said “Pierre” …I started laughing as it all clicked in my head.    Pee-er sounded like Pierre which is French for “Peter”.  … “yes, yes” in French is  “oui, oui” (pronounced “wee wee”).  Even now, nearly 20 years later, I still get a little giggle out of it, and wonder… if I could find a little beret, would Buddy keep his Pierre covered?
~ASM

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